Author: Nisi skyeathena
Pairing: Dom/Billy/Lij (also featuring a few choice moments with the infamous all gay cast)
Summary: the worst part about a drunken bet is not going through with it.
Disclaimer: I own nobody and know nothing. 100% fiction.
Notes: Written for Marysia, who wanted humorous Dom/Billy/Lij smut (don’t we all, sweetie!). I loved writing this, it’s my first fic with the three of them. Thanks to beanzy for the great Beta. It’s at about 4,000 words, Merry Christmas to all!
Poker nights were always something to look forward to, after all it was a blatant excuse to get drunk without the hassles of going out. Anyways, Dom figured, he had all the eye candy he needed at the table with him. Not that he’d say anything. There was an unspoken agreement within the cast that they weren’t going to date one another. Things had been harmonious from the start and the awkwardness of relationships would just ruin all of that. Anyways, who wanted to see the person they were sleeping with sixteen hours during their day? He had the feeling Orlando may have slept with a few people, he just knew that he wasn’t one of them.
“Where’d everybody go?” Lij asked. It was hard to see his face due to the fact that he was stooped in his chair with twenty five beer bottles in front of his face. Dom figured about six of those belonged to him. Billy’s various glasses of drinks were neatly clustered in a circle in front of him, he really wasn’t the beer type.
“They left. It’s like, three in the morning dude.” Dude. How did that word become such a part of his vocabulary? He gave California boy a dirty look.
“Then why are we still here?” Billy asked.
“Well, you live here.” Dom said. “And we’re in the middle of a round.” Dom didn’t mention that this round had taken about an hour, considering that as they got their cards, they became engrossed in a conversation about how hilarious it was when they put a Orc helmet next to Liv while she slept and the way she woke up screaming. As the conversation fizzled twenty minutes ago, they all just stared in a drunken stupor at the various books and movies Billy owned. Dom found it scary that he was able to do some kind of ‘six degrees’ with Lij and the star of every movie Billy owned. Most of the people he was able to connect with only two or three actors. Lucky fucker.
“Well, should we finish then?” Lij’s voice came from behind the bottles. He moved two out of the way, and suddenly he was visible.
“Yeah, have we placed our bets?”
“If we did, I don’t remember them.” Dom had taken to staring at Billy, whose eyes were slightly glazed over in that sleepy, oblivious to all kind of way. It made him wonder if he looked like that in the moments before he went to sleep. He wasn’t sure why the idea of Billy in bed gave him such a reaction. Then, as he looked at him again, it all made perfect sense. He was Billy. Billy was amazing in every way, and now that the excitement of their new found friendship was starting to fizzle, Dom couldn’t deny the craving of wanting to get that feeling with another type of relationship.
Maybe he’d test the waters…
As Billy finished his drink, he looked to Dom. “I’ll put twenty down.”
“Cheapass.” Lij muttered from behind his cards.
“It’s called strategy.”
“Lij has a point.” Dom slurred. “It’s the last round of the night, let’s make it worth something.”
“No, let’s not do money. Why don’t we think of something better?”
“Like Billy’s jacket.” Lij said sleepily. He was constantly stealing this hideous green down jacket Billy had to combat the cold New Zealand mornings.
“You couldn’t offer me anything as good as the jacket.” Billy placed his glass down on the table.
“I could clean up for you for a week.”
Billy shook his head. “Your idea of cleaning…”
“Jeez, Dad. Fine. I’ll be your slave for a week, within reason.”
“Dom’s the one who decides if something is too much.”
Dom smirked. “You sure you’re up for that?” There was something so appealing about having a willing Lij in his fingertips. After all, him and Billy had the same mind.
Lij got a cocky grin. “Definitely. You up for the same bet?”
“Sure. Although I can’t think of anything I want from either of you.”
“What about the slave thing?”
“I think I’ll raise it a little. Maybe a one time thing.”
“What’s the thing?”
“A blow job.”
Billy and Lij laughed.
Lij let out a small gasp, the look of panic plastered across his face. For a minute, Dom was going to take pity and say he was kidding, but then he saw a momentary glimmer to Lij’s eyes. It was a look of excitement and curiosity, he saw it whenever Lij was interested in something. This could actually happen.
Billy paused for a moment. “I’m in.”
“Wait.” Lij mumbled. “I’m confused about how this works. If I win, do I get both a slave and the jacket? Or if I lose, do I have to do” he paused, as his voice got quiet. “both?”
“Um, we pick which one we want. That sounds good, right?” Dom was looking to Billy for help, but he was just staring at Lij. Maybe seeing the same thing he was. The two of them had made their sexuality open for some time now, and although Lij had no problem with it, he hadn’t shown any signs of joining them, or any other guy.
However, he was seriously thinking about this. Maybe he’d be into it, if it was in another time, another place. Or maybe it was the alcohol. He watched Billy pour himself another drink, handing the bottle over to Lij, whose hand was shaking.
“Nah. The cards aren’t that good.” He finally mumbled.
Billy gave a little pout.
Lij spoke again. “But I definitely want to see this.”
“Fine by me.” Dom winked at him. “K Bills, how many?”
Billy, who was in mid drink, put two fingers up.
“Good idea.” Dom said as he handed him the cards. “Be good to your throat, you’ll be using it later.”
Lij looked back and forth at the two. “What was wild again?”
“Ladies in red.” Dom answered. “Speaking of which,” He laid down his cards. “one of them gave me a full house.”
Billy closed his eyes for a minute, his whole body swayed and then he quickly opened them again. “Three kings.”
There was a short silence, until Lij and Dom said “Oh my god.” at the same time.
“I would have bet with that.” Dom said. “If that makes you feel any better.”
“Oh, I don’t feel bad about this. I would have hated to give up my coat.” He turned to Lij and winked. “Wanna stay around for this?”
“Um, yeah. Can I?” He said quietly.
“Adorable isn’t he?” Billy looked at Dom, smiling.
“Fucking precious.” He agreed, directing his beer bottle towards Lij’s for a toast. Shyly, Lij clanked his.
“Shit, lets hope I’m sober enough to remember this.” Dom mumbled.
“Or get it up. I’ll be pissed if you can’t even fucking enjoy this.” Billy took one long drink and let out a small giggle. “Because I know it wont be my fault.”
“Oh, I forgot you were the Scottish ambassador of cock sucking. Let’s see your skills, eh?” Dom unzipped, already growing hard at the idea of this. He didn’t expect Lij to watch, but was definitely not disappointed that he was there, seated next to Billy and just as excited for what was about to happen.
Billy got up from his chair quickly, too quickly. He took a moment to try to balance himself, and ended up teetering to the ground.
“Fuck!” Lij said as Billy made contact with the tile floor, his arm hitting with the chair, taking it down with him.
Dom got up, forgetting this his pants were undone. They fell to his ankles.
Lij had crawled to his side, he examined Billy’s face. “He just passed out, I think.”
“Of course he did.” Dom mumbled. “Just my fucking luck.”
“What should we do?”
“Well, we’ll get him to his bed, on his back. And then I‘ll lock myself in his bathroom for a wank.”
Billy was a heavy fucker when he wanted to be. Dom found it hard to get a good grip from under Billy’s arms, as Lij kept on dropping his legs. As soon as they placed him on the bed, Lij ducked his head and mumbled about having to leave.
They avoided any mention of sex or gayness for the rest of that week. They also refrained from touching one another. This resulted in a week of taking the piss out of everyone but themselves. Needless to say, the rest of the cast was growing tired of them and they were stuck with one another, only to avoid talking about ‘it’. It was a long week, especially for poor Astin who didn‘t even have the luxury of knowing why everybody was so weird.
In an attempt to make things normal again, Lij asked everybody over for a Friday poker night. He was dreading the hell out of it but thought that if he pretended that everything was back to normal, somehow it’d all just go away.
Poker nights never consisted of too many cards. Maybe a round or two at the end of the night, at the insistence of Orlando who liked to torment everybody by grazing the cards against his lower lip and found that he could win a decent sum of money when playing footsie with the person he was betting against. It was usually a night of takeout and chain smoking and gossip.
Dom was thanking the gods of perverted men for the stuntman who had taken a liking to Orlando. The whole evening was filled with their elf wondering why men just can’t leave him alone.
“You guys have got to help me! He can’t take a hint!”
“I would, if I didn’t know that you secretly loved it.” Bean grumbled.
Poor Astin, the sole het man in the room, wandered off to get a drink. He’d probably have a better time with Liv and Cate.
“I don’t! Sure it‘s flattering, but you just wouldn‘t understand man!”
After someone managed to quiet Orlando by offering to hook him up with somebody else, he asked if they could get to the cards.
As Bean began to deal, Viggo cleared his throat.
“Let’s make some really good bets tonight to make this more fun.”
Dom‘s stomach dropped. He was still slightly bitter about last week, and wasn‘t up for being reminded of it. “Actually I was thinking we could forego them tonight.”
“Then what’s the point of playing?”
“Well,” Dom continued, searching for something, anything to say. “we live in such a capitalist world, I think having no bets would be a good way to protest.”
Orlando rolled his eyes.
“Then how about for moral reasons? Today is a holiday, a um, Jewish holiday.”
“It is not!” Orlando took a drink from his glass. “Anyways, Jews have no problem with gambling.”
“Oh, I see how it is! You’re Jewish when it’s convenient.”
Before Orlando could respond, Viggo spoke up.
“He’s actually got a good point. We should stop using money. Let’s dare one another to do things instead.”
Bean’s eyes lit up like a kid on Christmas. He finished handing out the cards. Within seconds of getting theirs, the three hobbits slammed down their hands.
“Fold.” Lij mumbled.
Billy bit his lip. “Damn my luck.”
“I’m gonna call it a night.” Dom announced.
“Jesus! It’s like you three share the same brain.”
“Maybe it’s not the only thing they’re sharing.” Orlando winked at Bean.
Astin returned from the kitchen, handing Dom a drink. “Made one for you, your favorite.”
“No thanks. I’m not drinking tonight.”
“Is this part of your new found Judaism?” Orlando smirked.
Lij went to extinguish his cigarette but he was so busy watching Dom, he put it out on the table. “Oh shit, sorry!”
“It’s your table…” Viggo mumbled.
“Oh, but still.”
Billy suddenly stood up. “Us non married hobbits need to have a meeting, like now.”
As they headed towards the patio, Astin whispered to the guys. “We should leave.”
“And miss the hobbit orgy?”
Orlando got an idea. “We could relocate so they can think we’re gone.”
“You guys are pervs.” Astin sighed.
“C’mon! It’s for the good of the cast! I can’t believe you don’t show more concern for your fellow hobbit.” Orlando was shaking his head in dismay.
“Honestly!” Bean chimed in. “Where’s the commitment to this movie?”
“Nice try. I’ll give you guys some privacy, and even do you a favor if someone promises to tell me what happens in the morning.” Astin left, going towards the patio doors. “Guys, poker’s done. You can go back into the front room.” As he left, he gave a thumbs up to Orlando, Sean and Viggo who had hid under the counter of the adjacent kitchen.
“Sean Astin.” Viggo smiled. “Professional accomplice to the gay man.”
Billy, Dom and Lij came in. Dom was pacing around the coffee table, Lij had his eyes averted and Billy kept on looking back and forth at the two.
“We’re talking about this. Now.”
“Nothing to talk about.”
“Yeah, not like we‘re full on gay or anything.” Lij said.
“I am.” Billy said.
Dom stopped walking. “And I’m open to anything.”
“Then maybe you two should do something about it.” There was an air of bitterness to Lij’s tone.
“But that would leave you out, and when you’re not around it just isn’t right. It’s completion, that’s why this hasn’t happened before.”
“We had a chance.” Dom glared at Billy, still offended. “It just isn’t meant to be.”
“We have a chance now.” As Billy said that, Viggo nudged Sean and Orlando and pointed to the door. Orlando shook his head and Sean just grinned.
“I have an idea.” He continued. “You and I look at the hands we were dealt. Whoever has a better cards gets oral.”
“What about me?” Lij asked softly.
“I thought you didn’t want any part of it.”
“I don’t.” He fought back his smile. “I just think that since I was there, it would be messing with the cosmic order or something.”
“If we do this, it’s because we want to. Not because we’re drunk or anything.”
“And to make it better,” Dom added. “the person who wins has to choose who is the one to do it.”
“What should we base it on?”
“Who has the better cock sucking mouth.” Dom nudged Lij who turned crimson.
“You guys in?”
Orlando looked at Sean and Viggo, then whispered. “Yeah, you guys in?”
Viggo smiled. “You serious?”
“Definitely.” He looked at Sean. “Pick your person.”
Sean bit his lip, contemplating. “Billy.”
“Dom.” Viggo whispered.
“Guess I’ve got Lij.” Orlando said.
“With his luck, you’re going to get a mouthful.” Sean nudged Viggo, who started laughing too hard.
The three hobbits picked up their cards. Lij let out a slight groan as he placed his hand down. A pair of twos was the best he had.
Billy gave a little smile and laid down his cards one at a time. Queen of spades, eight of diamonds, nine of diamonds, ten of diamonds and Jack of diamonds.
Dom grabbed Billy’s arm. “I should have known! Cheater!”
“I swear, I didn’t look at my hand when they first gave it to me! I didn’t know I had such a good cards!”
Lij gave him the finger.
“Believe me. This is luck. Or fate or something.”
Lij looked over at Dom. “What do you have?”
“Absolutely fucking nothing.”
In the kitchen, Bean’s face lit up. “Let’s get out of here boys.” A screen door was attached to the back of the kitchen. They crawled their way through and quietly shut it behind them.
Billy wasn’t sure if the caffeine he had earlier was kicking in, or if he was just scared at hell at what was about to happen. Either way, he was trembling. “I really didn’t want to win.”
“I can’t make this choice.” Billy slumped in his chair.
“Well, blame Dom for the idea! It didn’t occur to him that this would be a hard thing to do with two of your best friends who suddenly changed overnight.”
Dom‘s voice turned grave, almost painful as he faced Lij. “You think this was an overnight thing? Like it hasn’t always been there?”
“It’s still hard, and just weird.”
“Yeah, but we get to actually make a choice for ourselves this way. We can’t blame it on the alcohol or the cards. This is me speaking.”
“Well Billy,” Lij was trembling as well. “what do you want?”
“If you’re going to sound so disgusted about the whole fucking thing, Lij…” Dom snapped.
“You think I’m joking when I say I’m not gay? You guys forget sometimes that I’m eighteen fucking years old. Maybe I’ve never kissed a guy, let alone fucked one.”
Dom and Billy were speechless, finally Billy exhaled the deep breath that he took.
“Fuck. I can’t do that to you Lij, c’mon Dom.”
“Oh, glad to know I’m your consolation prize.”
Billy looked at the two. “This was a bad idea. Just forget it, we’ll go back to normal.”
“Can’t.” Dom said. “Not with either of you.”
The last part made Lij, who was heading towards the door, stop.
“We can’t ignore this. We can do it a different way, I’d be happy with that, but it’s all or nothing with us.”
There was an earnestness, a desperation to Dom’s voice that hit Lij’s core. The truth had a funny way of doing that.
“Guys.” Lij headed over to Dom and Billy, taking each of their hands and leading them towards the hallway, towards his bedroom.
“I want to try this. With you both. I‘ve hesitated for so long because I was afraid I‘d make the wrong decision. And now, I can‘t risk getting left out of this.”
“We wouldn’t leave you out.”
“C’mon. Let’s have some fun.” The three continued down the hallway, collapsing on top of Lij on his bed. “If you feel guilty, you can always make me the center of attention.”
Billy looked at Lij adoringly. “Hey! I thought I was the one who won the bet here!”
Dom took this opportunity to kiss Lij sweetly on the lips. Lij’s eyes were gleaming as they released and he wrapped his arms around Billy for a different yet equally affectionate kind of kiss.
“Still gay?” Dom whispered, licking his ear.
“I’m hooked now.” Lij said lazily, his arms wrapped around Billy’s neck. “Now I want to watch you two kiss.”
Billy kept a hand cupped on Lij’s cheek as he devoured Dom’s mouth. Dom’s hand was pressed against his chest, balled up in a fist to contain his excitement. Lij watched this, running both of his hands under their shirts, feeling the warmth of their stomachs.
Positioning was a bit confusing at first, until Lij found that if he laid on his back in the middle, with Dom and Billy on their sides, they could have easy access to one another. As Dom and Billy continued to kiss, Lij broke them up quickly to remove Billy’s shirt. He did the same to Lij, as he tried to work on Dom’s. Dom rolled on top of Lij, straddling him. He could feel his hardness through his pants, and quickly joined as Dom grinded his hips against his. Lij moaned into Billy’s mouth, who was in turn moaning as Dom’s hand had found it’s way under his pants and began to stroke.
“Fuck.” Lij said, his breath heavy. “Pants off!”
As Lij fumbled with getting his jeans past his ankles, Dom nudged him. “I believe we owe Billy something.”
“Mmmmph.” He said, laying back against the pillow.
“Why choose when you could have both of us suck you off.” Lij gave Billy a quick peck on the cheek.
“Would you like that?” Dom had a silly as shit grin on his face, Billy nodded and led Dom’s head down to his cock.
“So Lij,” Dom said, stroking his hand up and down Billy’s length. “here’s how to do it.” His tongue slowly glided along the tip of his cock.
“You want to tease him first, right?” Lij was knelt beside Dom, leaning down to try.
Billy was transfixed as he stared at the doe eyed, curious look on Lij’s face as he took him into his mouth. After a few expert lessons from Dom, Lij finally took pity and took him completely in. Billy was moaning too loud to hear Lij coughing, but he felt his mouth being replaced with Dom’s. After he came, panting on the bed and mumbling, Lij wasn’t able to wipe the silly as shit grin off his face.
“This is fun.”
Billy sat up, kissing the flesh behind Lij’s ear. “Just fun?”
“Well, fun and passionate and…” his eyes shut as Billy’s tongue moved down to his neck. Dom straddled Lij’s lap grinding against him. “so fucking sexy.”
“Would you like more?” Dom whispered.
“What would you like?”
“To fuck you two, not sure which one I want more.”
Billy removed his mouth from Lij’s neck, smiling at Dom. “So young, and already he doesn’t want to play the bitch.”
Dom smiled. “It’s okay. I’m all for being on the receiving end of things!”
Lij looked back and forth at the two. “Can‘t the three of us just do it at once?”
“Sure, let me just draw a diagram.”
Dom crawled up to the center of the bed, laying on his back with his legs spread. “Billy, you come here. And Lij, you kneel behind him.” As Billy approached him, Dom found a spare pillow to put under his back. Lij found something incredibly appealing about Dom’s lack of inhibition, how he had no problem displaying his goodies in the well lit room for them to study before this began.
Billy had his fingers in Dom, showing Lij how to get him ready. Without warning, he felt Lij’s two fingers enter him, he moaned, spreading his legs further.
“What’s with the surprise attack?”
“Don’t get me wrong, I like it.”
“Do you like this?” Lij removed his fingers, only to replace them with his lubed up cock.
“Fuck!” Billy gasped.
Dom watched this, turned on as ever. “Kids a fucking natural.”
“Hey grasshopper, can you hold it for a minute?” Billy craned his neck to look back at Lij, whose eyelashes fluttered in response. Dom scooted his body closer to Billy’s, so he could just enter him quickly. He took a moment to compose himself. He forgot to tell them that he hadn’t taken two guys at once before, and it was such a foreign and wonderful feeling.
“Okay Lij, you’re in charge here.”
He began to move slowly. “So no pressure at all. I’ll just have two unhappy people if I fuck this up.”
“You’re doing great babe.” Dom moaned from under Billy.
Billy had the feeling this would end quick. He was near gone, being on the giving and receiving end. Listening to Lij’s moaning, he knew his first time would be a classic quickie. To make sure Dom enjoyed this, he cupped his cock and began stroking frantically. He was the first to climax, keeping still as Lij just kept on pushing him harder and harder, and further into Dom who was quivering beneath him, and next to come. Lij let out an actual yell, something that surprised Billy as he didn’t think he’d be a screamer and then collapsed on Billy’s back.
“Everyone taken care of?” He asked in between breaths.
“Yeah, we’re good.”
Lij rolled off of them, curling against Dom, who pulled Billy closer to his body.
“And to think,” Dom began. “we’ve been wasting all of this time playing cards.”